Last time I posted, I talked about having to move, and how that sucks and stuff. I'm over it. I really want to move.
God has a way of making me ready to do things that I don't want to do by cutting away at my comfort zone so that it just doesn't exist anymore.
I should explain. One of the things that really made me want to stay was the school district and Micah's place there. He has an amazing aid and a great team at the school working with him and he is succeeding. It has been a great year. Well, I found out that the district "lost" the papers that I turned in to keep my son at his school even though the high school boundaries are changing. Basically, I was informed that he was leaving that whole situation anyway. I also found out that my son's aid has an internship next year and will be leaving him as well. There went all of my carefully crafted work to put my son in the best situation. All of the plans for his behavior are laid out in an extensive IEP (individual education plan), but the thing is that it would travel to the next school anyway, even if it is out of the district. Micah's plans are going to be different anyway.
Another thing was the Challenger baseball program that I am in charge of needing to continue. Well, this year has been the most challenging for getting people behind our kids. I have had so many difficulties this year in the league that I'm ready to give up. The other teams won't buddy, we only have 9 players, so there's nobody to play against, the other leagues in the area won't travel with Challengers, the coaches are having trouble making it to practices and games, and the team is just losing all spirit. I don't know what to do to make it better, but I feel like it needs to be someone other than me trying. I just can't do it on my own. I am throwing a big party and game for the end of the season, and I hope it turns out well. I can't do much beyond that at this point because we just have nothing left.
As far as my girls go, at this point, I'm not upset about them leaving their schools, though I wouldn't be upset about them staying, either. I'm not totally tied to it either way. I love subbing for the twin's school, and if we move far I won't be doing that, but honestly, with my grandmother's condition, I'm probably not going to be doing much in the way of subbing anyway.
Becca is probably the kid with the shortest straw. She is super involved in everything. ASB at school, cheer at school, praise team at church, and a ton of other things that she just loves doing. When we started this process, I told her that we would look for a place where she might have her own room, but we couldn't say for sure that she would get one. If we get the house I really want (I will get to that later), she won't get her own room. As an 8th grade kid moving to a new school, ASB is probably not an option. Cheer may be, but it depends on the program at the next school and what is done there. She will also be a new kid at a new school again, and she had a horrible time that happened, and that wasn't during puberty. Leaving for her is still a bummer, but life is full of stuff like that, and I just can't fix everything for her. She's learning resilience.
So many of the things that have been holding me back from liking the idea of moving are just disappearing. While all of this is happening, I'm packing and checking out houses. I'm praying over the move, asking for a place to go where I will love everything. Somewhere where our family can function far better than we are currently. We searched, applied, got turned down, and searched again. I really thought that we were going to be stuck between a rock and a hard place, not having a home. We are getting to the point where timelines are starting to be a thing, and June is not going to be a happy time if we have nowhere to go.
Yesterday my mom and I went to take a look at a place in Perris. If you aren't familiar with SoCal, it's just the middle of nowhere. There's a freeway nearby where people speed by this place to get to somewhere else. I wasn't really in love with the idea of this place at first, but I was praying about it, looking into the schools, looking into the programs around there for kids, and everything else, and I wasn't really unhappy with the findings. It's still not far from my in-laws, but not Hemet and quite a bit closer to a freeway making the commute easier for my mom and husband. I also have a good friend who lives even further into the middle of nowhere, but nearby where we would be, so that makes me very excited. Then we looked at the house. It was like the layout was exactly what we would describe if we were talking about exactly what we were looking for. My mom and I fell in love...and that's not an easy thing for my mom to do.
This is yesterday. Last night Tony sent in our application online. We are praying so much that God clears the way for us to be there. I will probably be completely heartbroken if we don't get it, but at the moment I am at peace. I'm trusting God that He will take care of it all.
