Parenting Advice...a better explanation

For those of you who read my blog that is now deleted, I sincerely apologise. I said some things in it that I should not have. I really want to better explain myself because there are things that I wrote that did not come out as I intended. I appriciate the person who showed me that I did not explain myself well.

First of all, I would like to show you a verse that better explains the point that I was trying to make, but failed miserably.

"Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. Then they can train the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God." Titus 2:3-5

This passage was written to Titus by Paul. Paul was teaching Titus how to instruch various groups within the church. This is specifically Titus how to instruct the older women so that they can know and what to teach the younger women. Older women instructing the younger on how to raise their children is not a new concept, nor was it then. It does not say for this to stop, and if you know of a place in the Bible that tells us this, please show me. What this scripture tells us is how and what to say as a follower of Christ.

Women are generally supposed to be silent. This is something that I struggle with, but, this specific scripture tells us a specific group that we are supposed to speak to and subjects that we should speak about.

When it talks about teaching the older women not to be slanderers, I believe that it is because the attitude of the teacher, or person giving advice, needs to not be the "you are doing that all wrong, this is how you do it!" and more of an attitude. This is often the case for those who give advice in the grocery store or wal-mart. They say things because the child is annoying them, not out of concern. This is my problem with grocery store advice.

There are also those who give advice because they believe that their way is the only way to do things. Now, if you can back up your ideas with scripture, I agree that they should be adamant about it. However, if it is not specifically from God, it is fallible. This attitude of pride I have in the past been convicted of, and I still am sure that God is still not done with me yet in this area.

I do, however, know many things because of my experiences with parenting thus far. There are many who know more than I, but there are no others who know everything that I know. My kids, like everyone else's, are different than any other children. Because of my experiences, God has put me in a position to assist others by sharing my knowledge. He is also teaching me so that I will better be able to instruct. He has put many people in my path whose instruction has been invaluable to me. He has also put people in my path who chose to share with me information that does not apply to my situation, is rude, and is not helpful. There were also many cases that information was given to me that might have been helpful, but I didn't want to accept it because of how it was presented. This is why we need to be careful how we give information.

Advice needs to be given, for without the voice of experience, we make mistakes that could be avoided. However, and I say this to myself as much as anyone else, it needs to be given properly. God gives us instructions, and we need to seek Him first so that the words that we say are in His will, and are also as effective as they can be.

For those of us who also accept that advice, which should really be everyone, for no one but God knows everything, we need to be willing to listen, even if the person giving that advice may not be approaching us in the correct way. We listen to others, we go to God to be certain of His will, and we either apply the advice, or we don't. There have been times that I have received advice from non-christians that was very helpful, even if it was not given in the best way. Of course, we just can't expect non-christians to act like christians.

I stand by the concept that "it takes a village to raise a child," but I would really like it if my village didn't have idiots. But then, God often uses the idiots.